Saving Christmas

Against all odds, the Christmas I hoped never to remember has become one I will never forget.

I've lost track of days now. It’s slightly past midnight as I write so Christmas is officially over. I rolled the Christmas Spirit of the season into the last few hours of Dec 25^th. It came late but it came.

I've long loved the holidays. They begin in October for me and last through New Year’s. As I've grown older they've become more difficult. It began a few years back when I discovered my occupation meant I spent the holidays working. It was difficult at first but as the years have gone on, it’s gotten more and more upsetting. For me, the holidays are about spending and making memories with friends and family. Imagine my surprise when I discovered not only would I spend them this year at work but I would spend every one working overtime. I don’t know how many hours I've worked this week. Maybe 80. It’s all a blur to me now. All I knew is I would be living at work, out of a hotel room; my last shred of holiday cheer crushed when I discovered late Christmas Eve it would be spent at work, again, to be available to work even earlier the next morning while the roads were shut because of a major storm. I was inconsolable. I cried. Maybe because of stress or the long hours working hard, feeling more alone as each day wore on--I wept at being trapped in a world of cold snow. My director could see I was deeply discouraged and told me to stop whatever I was doing and go rest. So, I had a few hours to myself on Christmas Eve. I had a fireplace and a beautiful snowy wonderland outside my window. I was miserable. I was alone.

A few days earlier my sister and brother in law made the trek to my work to visit and they brought me a Christmas present. Knowing I was trapped there and not able to come to the annual Christmas Eve gathering, they came. It touched my heart and I kept their gift out as a reminder during my stay. I treasure nothing more than I treasure my family.

My friends are very near and dear to me. They have been a godsend more times than I can count. It’s been the last three years I've been lucky enough to find friends who have become family.  Tonight, a dear friend’s family was visiting as I showed up at their house, my car dead after my long absence. I had been dropped off by my brother who was kind enough to store it for me while I was working. As I walked in they all wished me a Merry Christmas and welcomed me with hugs and kind words. They didn't know at the moment, between the loneliness and the despair of missing the holidays, that to see a family together, welcoming me with open arms, was nothing short of a miracle. It saved Christmas.While I couldn't be home with my family, I had family to spend Christmas with.

Santa, I was told last night you were the Christmas spirit. I was sure you would miss me this year. Thank you for saving Christmas.